Chel asked me a burning question I’m sure you’ve all been losing sleep over…

Am I going to have a +1 at her wedding???

I’ve spent the past couple of days mulling over this question. I thought about it while we waited in line for Alice in Wonderland, and Chel asked everyone except me who was the funnier one in their current relationships (you don’t need to ask me who was funnier in all my past relationships—I’m clearly a riot). The four of us have been attached at the nip for as long as I can remember, and I have always been the single one out. Sure, a couple of them have been single while I was single (and for a very brief moment we all were single), but I’m the only one who is ever single alone. I thought about it again when I went to dinner with my sister earlier tonight, and we ran into two of her ex-boyfriend’s ex-girlfriends. I realized that all of them were engaged—her ex-boyfriend and all of his ex’s, my sister included.

I’m almost certain that my status will remain unchanged three months from now. That’s not me being pessimistic; I’m actually quite the opposite. I think I see the good in people too often, thinking that they’re worth more than they really are… even though they continue to disprove me repeatedly. It doesn’t help that today marks a full week since Il Postino did me dirty again (and not in a good way), and as predicted, no apologies have been offered.

And so I told Chel that I won’t be needing a +1. She already has 300 guests. I don’t want her spending another $50 on dinner for this tentative +1 of mine. Alas, I will be the only one out of five bridesmaids and two maids of honor without a date. And if you’re reading this thinking, “Damn, I really wanted to be your +1…” then maybe you should stop stalking me on the internet and make movements instead—yes, I’m talking to you, Anthony!

I had a craftastic evening with the bride-to-be and her bevy of bridesmaids. I finished the wedding invitations while the girls worked on the centerpieces. Check us out—designing invitations, hot gluing sticks together (or in Shi’s case, her hair), living in a personal hell I call diet and exercise in order to fit into our dresses… Being a bridesmaid is serious work! It’s a good thing I love this broad.

What an awesome movie to have my first IMAX 3D experience in! Loved, loved, loved it ♥

The Mad Hatter: Have I gone mad?
Alice: I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I’ll tell you a secret. All the best people are.

The design geek inside of me is lusting after these Helvetica Cookie Cutters. My love for typography has joined forces with my love for baking! It couldn’t be more perfect than Helvetica itself.

Now who do I have to bone to combine my love for carbs with my love for not exercising?

He’ll never learn, cabrona. But then again, neither will you…

(image via sberon)

SpongeBob: What do you usually do when I’m gone?
Patrick: Wait for you to come back.

(image via sanahasflickr.)

I will not be the first one to speak. And if he never calls me again, I’ll always think of him fondly. As an asshole.

I waited for you in the rain last night, and the only thing I wanted to do more than turn around and go home was see you. I don’t know what makes me more sad—the fact that you haven’t apologized, or knowing that you wouldn’t.

(image via thewordsalloverme)