…or what happens when a certain someone leaves my amazon prime account logged in on her dad’s computer.

If a man ever laid a finger on me like that, HE WOULD BE DEAD.

The last time Paul McCartney played a show in San Diego, I wasn’t even born yet. But I grew up listening to the Beatles because my dad would blast their records and play along with his guitar when I was a kid. I always thought he was their biggest fan, but Anthony might be giving him a run for his money.

Since none of our friends are going to the show with us, I’ll probably have to be Anthony’s emergency contact for when he faints like a fangirl at a Michael Jackson concert! Ha. When I asked my dad if he wanted tickets for his birthday, he said that he already bought tickets for himself, my mom and their friends before I even got mine. My bad, presale! Maybe someone else can be Anthony’s emergency contact after all.

Made in LA (@ Hammer Museum)

A giant load is the only thing on the agenda tonight (@ Bubble Beach Laundry)

I threw my pie for you (@ Pie Not)

Swing life away (@ OC Fair)

Angelenos (@ Angel City Brewery)

If anyone can convince me to join Tinder, it’s Djengus Roundstone.

I hope the D’s not silent…

Cute carbs (@ Superba Food + Bread)

Holy hipster (@ Anaheim Packing House)

Made in L.A. Music night every Thursday (@ Hammer Museum)

I keeps it real. Also, I’m apparently still sexy.

The realest thing I’ve ever read.

The beauty of getting lost in DTLA (@ Boyd & Omar)

Darien waiting for a birthday surprise or channeling his inner Pennsatucky? You decide.

Who doesn’t like a little chorizo in their bloody mary every once in a while? (@ Great Maple)

Ice cream flight kind of night (@ Hammond’s Gourmet Ice Cream)

Accurate.

I was the only person they carded! #faceofaminor (@ Alpine Beer Co)

On Wednesdays, we eat Churro Borough (@ Ramekin)

Bathroom break (@ Skechers)

Who wore it better? (@ Waypoint Public)

DIY Donut Balloons for my favorite 3-year-old!

My work conference started off with an inspirational speech by President Bill Clinton and ended with half naked dancers and one too many tequila shots with the VPs.

So… just another day at the office.

Say hello to my new Mazda3!

I def have a type. I would’ve replaced my Matrix with another, but Toyota discontinued them last year, and I really wanted to buy myself a brand new car. After driving a rental for almost a month, I finally found a car that I love! It’s a charcoal gray hatchback just like my Matrix was, except it looks a lot sleeker, has power steering (which I thought I had this whole time until I drove a car that actually had power steering), and bluetooth so I can listen to my Young the Giant spotify playlist instead of my Young the Giant CD, among other upgrades. I feel like I’m driving my Matrix when I’m in it.

Maybe I should’ve kept $5,000 from my insurance settlement to pay Match.com to find me a date who looks just like my ex, too.

The power went out in my apartment building again last week! I was already running late, and I had to go back upstairs in the dark to tell the maintenance guy to manually open the garage gate so I could get to fucking work already. This has happened three times in less than two months! And these are only the incidents that I know of, because I spend less than 50% of my time in this apartment (unless a burglar is reading this, in which case I’m home all the time. Plus I always keep my sharpest pair of fabric scissors within reach. And I’m not afraid to cut you.)

Once I get my new car situation settled, I’m moving out of this overpriced shit hole and torching it on yelp!

Somebody got lei’d last night (@ Santana High School)

The 4 most beautiful words ever put together: Churro Ice Cream Sandwich (@ Ramekin)

Churro Borough had a pop-up shop at my fave dessert spot in LA the one day I happened to be there, and my life will never be the same.

Refrigerator door to the past (@ Good Times at Davey Wayne’s)

I may or may not have binge-watched the entire new season of Orange is the New Black this past weekend.

That one time Kimbra showed up at the Electric Wire Hustle show (@ Bootleg HiFi)

I knew that my affinity for facial hair and keeping random shit in my purse would be useful someday. I won enough Bath & Body Works prizes to regift for years to come.

Three of my cousins are pregnant, and this is my life right now.

Congrats Shi and Christine! (@ Rock ‘n’ Roll San Diego Marathon)

I need new friends. And a new car :( It’s officially totaled!

Banks – Waiting Game

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What if the way we started
Made it something cursed from the start

Stoned (@ LACMA)

She knows me too well.

I’m pretty sure my car is totaled, but at least I was near a Pizza Port when I almost died on the 5 today. (@ Pizza Port)

I love the silence between us when it comes to burgers and bread pudding. Like, don’t even talk to me right now. (@ Hook & Plow)

…or when your plans get canceled because the power went out in your apartment building, and your car is stuck in the sub garage. Again.

You leave LA for one weekend, and people cheat on you with wonuts.

I procured this hen for Deane last night, and I forget the rest. (@ Guelaguetza)

Same.

I caught Meb checking me out at work today!

Oh, wait. It’s just some creep.

I was promised mojitos, and all I got was this picture of Anthony and his LOML.

Beer, buddies, and beer buddies (@ Pizza Port)

tylerknott:

afadthatlastsforever:

FILE UNDER: Reasons I can’t talk to you RN.

There are a million ways to bleed. But you are by far my favorite.

The most beautiful wood I’ve ever sat on ♥

Get yours @ onefortythree!

Sister time @ Unique LA yesterday with Pammie, Deane and her sister, Andrea!

My favorite purchase was this ‘You’re the only wiener for my bun’ card. I should have gotten multiples just in case! Ha.

About that brunch life (@ BLD)

Best. Pancakes. EVAR! I want to marry them, have their blueberry ricotta babies, and live happily ever after in that maple syrup log cabin tin.

Keep cool, my babies. Recipe here.

merelyamadness:

Free with every purchase of Shape-Ups (but only on Dos de Mayo).

This week’s edition of Who Wore It Better? (@ Skechers)

Danny, you know my plan in an emergency is just to count to ten and wait for death’s embrace.

Further evidence that The Mindy Project is actually about my life!

Adobo burgers and ube shakes. This is about as Filipino as I get. (@ The Oinkster Hollywood)

LIFE GOAL: Eat my way through LA Weekly’s 99 Essential Restaurants list (or die trying). 3 down, 96 to go. (@ SQIRL)

Macarons, tea and my beansss!

Awesome decor, freakishly large chicharonnes and colombian neck ties. (@ Escala)

Tove Lo – Habits (Hippie Sabotage Remix)

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Can’t go home alone again
Need someone to numb the pain
You’re gone and I’ve got to stay high
All the time to keep you off my mind

Always reblog.

Carnival across the street from the crib. Might have to put my bra back on for a churro.

Seriously, dude???

Photo booth fun with the Wyers (@ Estancia La Jolla)

Congrats #MrAndMrsOlivar! (@ Estancia La Jolla)

Every time one of us gets married, it’s like a mini reunion. I love that no matter how many days, months or years have gone by, we can all still pick up right where we left off ♥

The hideousness of my hand will haunt my dreams forever!

(But at least my boobs look great.)

I built this coffee table in an ongoing attempt to lower my Ikea to non-Ikea furniture ratio. Yes, this area rug is from Ikea, but The Great Pizza Box Fire of 2014 destroyed my non-Ikea rug, and I needed an affordable replacement! One step forward, two steps back…

This coffee table was built the same way I built my mid-century modern side table, but with a few modifications. I used pre-stain wood conditioner this time to prevent streaking and blotching. On a bigger job like this, you won’t be able to hide the ugly parts with succulents and a strategically placed Beyoncé print.

You can follow the same directions I used to build the side table. Just be sure to use these new measurements.

MATERIALS & TOOLS:

• 2 – 1″x12″-6′ common board ($12 each)
• 1 – 1″x4″-6′ common board ($3)
• Pre-Stain Wood Conditioner – I used Minwax Water-Based Pre-Stain Conditioner
• Wood Stain – I used Minwax Gel Stain in Hickory
• Clear Coat – I used Minwax Polycrylic in Clear Satin
• 16 – 1.75″ nails
• 4 – Mid-Century modern legs – I used 12″ hairpin legs ($61)
• Sandpaper
• Hammer
• Power drill

CUT LIST:

• 2 – 1″x12″-6′ common boards – 4 pieces that are cut 36″ long
  (the top & bottom boards)
• 1 – 1″x4″-6′ common board – 2 pieces that are cut 22.5″ long
  (the side boards)

Since I already had the gel stain and clear coat left over from building the side table, it only cost me $88 to make this coffee table! That’s cheaper than the Ikea rug it’s sitting on…

Last night’s much needed michelucas (@ Karina’s)

…or the reason why I missed my morning hike! SORRY, SHI!

Dance party (@ The Fonda)

Chromeo – Jealous (I Ain’t With It)

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…or my neighbors after I almost burned down our apartment building this past weekend.

My lease is up and the only hot neighbor I had moved out this month, so I’m pretty sure the universe is telling me that it’s time to move out of the sticks, fellas.

White negroni to start off the best meal I’ve had in a while (@ Bestia)

BEARD MAGIC HEALS EVERYTHING.
This is only the best e-card anyone has ever made me.
Thanks, Zack (and Levi!) ♥

NOTE TO SELF: Check the oven for empty pizza boxes before pre-heating it if you don’t want second degree burns. Or worse.

I was slicing up an avocado when I noticed smoke coming out of my oven. I opened it and saw that I left an empty pizza box in there like an asshole, and that shit was on fire! Instead of putting it out in the kitchen, I took the box out of the oven with my bare hands and ran across my apartment to the balcony. All the while, bits of flaming pizza box kept falling off along the way and lighting everything I hold dear to my heart on fire. My Anthropologie duvet. My area rug that I had just made an appointment to get cleaned. MY FUCKING HAND. I can live with a second degree burn, but they don’t sell that duvet at Anthropologie anymore, you guys!

It really is amazing I’ve made it this far.

No vodka? And where do I exit??? (@ Bootleg HiFi)

OH MY GLOB <3 (@ Gallery 1988)

I can’t pass a cronut shop without swerving into the parking lot (@ California Donuts)

Pot for dinner… also, we might eat at this Roy Choi resto (@ Pot at the Line Hotel)

Accurate.

Cro-muffin top (@ Kettle Glazed Doughnuts)

Got this Runyon thing on lock! (@ Runyon Canyon)

shadow-writer:

I’m terrible at both.

<3 (@ Poinsettia & Melrose)

Only in LA (@ Fairfax & Rosewood)

This is the second big earthquake we’ve had in less than two weeks! I should probably start wearing pants to bed if this is going to be a recurring event.

So the cafe inside my work has an instagram account, and all the employees who follow it have a chance to win a $25 gift card every week. I was pretty excited when I won last month. I was less excited about the photo they chose of me, but my instagram is devoid of selfies, so I forgive them.

Anyway, I was talking to my coworker who runs the instagram account, and he was saying how they make a big deal at the cafe when you get your gift card. And I was like, “Yeah, they even take your picture!” And he was like, “Wait, what… They don’t do that.” And then I realized that the guy who sells me my $9 pressed juice every morning took a picture of me on his cell phone for his own personal collection!

DIY furniture, vodka, and bread pudding.