I felt like an old lady after thirteen hours at the park and one rough ass ride on the matterhorn, but then I got carded and remembered that I’m still the paragon of youth.

My morning raclette (@ Venissimo – Liberty Station)

The guac is extra, and so is my boss (@ SKX Advertising Dept)

Happiest birthday, Shi! I love you more than I love homemade waffles. And that’s saying a lot.

Celebrating this baby’s mama (@ Liberty Public Market)

Birthdays, BBQ and BYOB (@ Grand Ole BBQ y Asado)

Thanks to everyone who came out last night ♥

Happy 64th birthday to a man of many talents!

Cheers to Alicia’s 36th birthday! 🍻 (@ California Adventure)

I spent 14 hours and $200 at the park, and all I took home was some dole whip cotton candy and a sunburn.

My mom flips bottles better than yours.
I hope I’m half this cool when I’m 58!

Birthday Blue Star Donuts for Mary (@ Venice Canals)

This peanut butter powdered donut with habanero blackberry jam will change your life.

Happy birthday with sprinkles on top! (@ California Donuts)

These donuts were almost as cute as my favorite 4-year-old ♥

Alicia’s birthday with these party animals (@ San Diego Zoo)

Homemade strawberry rhubarb birthday pie for my favorite pie-lover, Jessie!

Recipe from Smitten Kitchen.

Six of us were supposed to vacation in Portland, but new jobs, broken water heaters, half marathons and trips to Japan got in the way. Anthony and I obviously have nothing else going on in our lives, so the two of us spent our birthday weekend traveling the pacific northwest without those clowns!

One thing I love about Portland (and pretty much any other city besides LA) is the public transit system. You can get anywhere by light rail, street car, train or bus! The light rail took us straight from the airport to our hotel downtown for $2.50 (I’ve paid nearly $40 for a cab ride to LAX, and I only live 5 miles away!). What I also love about Portland is the food. OMG, the food. They are known for their food trucks, and our hotel was a couple blocks away from a group of like 20 or so of them at Alder Food Carts. I’ve been wanting to eat at Nong’s ever since I saw her on Chopped, and it was the first of many good meals we had that weekend.

Friday was Anthony’s birthday, and he wanted to go to McMenamins Kennedy School for drinks. It used to be an elementary school, but they converted it into a hotel/brewery. We had drinks in the boiler room, and I got sloppy hoping Jordan Catalano would show up to no avail.

Our friend Mark lives in Portland, and we met up with him for some late night eats at Biwa. He took us to some hipster bar called Bar Bar afterwards where we met some of his designer friends. Apparently, there’s a lot of job opportunities up there! Something to consider while I’m sitting in LA traffic…

Saturday was for snoozing. We slept in and hit up the farmer’s market around noon. When we couldn’t find the Pine State Biscuits booth, we decided to have lunch at Lardo, but not before having some pre-meal crepes at C’est Si Bon. The crepes were a mistake. And so were the donuts that followed at Blue Star. We somehow rolled ourselves back to the hotel and were in a food coma for the rest of the rainy afternoon. Everyone in Portland was watching the Seahawks playoff game, and we slept through half of it.

When we woke up, Anthony left to work out at the hotel gym, and I ventured out on my own to see the Portland Stag Sign without telling him. It’s no secret that I get lost easily, so he decided early on that he would navigate and I was to stay at his 8 o’clock at all times. I tried to take the bus by myself, got off at the wrong stop and found myself in BUMSVILLE. I eventually found my way back to the hotel, but not before Anthony returned from the gym. He was just coming to terms with the idea that I had been abducted when I walked through the door with a bag of hot cheetos and this photo. He was not amused.

I passed by Voodoo Doughnut on my way back. This bum in front threw his half eaten donut on the ground and started following me! I barely escaped with my life.

We had drinks at Whiskey Soda Lounge while we waited for our table at Pok Pok that night. FYI if you’re only going to Pok Pok for their famous wings, you can skip the wait and get them at Whiskey Soda Lounge instead. Or if Portland is too far, you can come visit me when they open a Pok Pok LA this spring ;) It definitely was everything the internet promised it would be.

Sunday was probably my favorite day, and we didn’t even spend it in Portland! We took an impromptu trip to Seattle and did every touristy thing we could fit into five hours. We ate the best clam chowder at Pike Place Chowder (and pre-meal empanadas at El Mercado Latino), dodged fish at Pike Place Fish Market, visited the first Starbucks, tested our gag reflex at the Gum Wall in Post Alley, went to the top of the Space Needle, and rode the Great Wheel. And this is where I found out this foolio is afraid of heights. The proof is in the video.

After spending six hours on the train that day, I showered back at the hotel before we met up with Mark and his friends for drinks at Dig a Pony. If I knew we were going to end up at a strip club later that night, I would have waited to shower afterwards! Ha. Apparently, Portland is the strip club capital of America, and no trip is complete without visiting one. Anyway, here are some dollars that Anthony let some girl pick up with her tits while we ate tater tots. No bigs!

Monday was my birthday and our last day in Portland. We had a bloody mary brunch at Tasty ‘n’ Sons, beers at Hopworks Bike Bar, doughnuts at Voodoo Doughnut, and coffee at Stumptown. I was really sick that day (Was it all the public transportation or was it the strip club? Who really is to blame???). I’m still sick two weeks later, so it’s taken me a while to get my life together and update this thing.

When we got back to Anthony’s house that night, Pammie and Christine came over with birthday burritos from Lolita’s! It was a great end to what Anthony refers to as “the time of my life.” He wishes!

Pammie’s birthday brunch (@ Great Maple)

When asked if I want a big ass pickle inside my bloody mary, the answer is always yes.

Who wore it better? (@ Waypoint Public)

DIY Donut Balloons for my favorite 3-year-old!

Tajin margarita (@ James Republic, Long Beach). Happy birthday, Karey!

Where the churros at???

Good advice from the birthday girl who gave me this print last Christmas ♥

Looks like I’ve locked down my birthday plans for 2014! Just kidding. The Golden Globes are also on that night.

You celebrate your own birthday on someone else’s birthday one time, and no one ever lets you forget it! Ha.

Happy 55th birthday to one crazy broad! At her birthday dinner last weekend, our waiter thought that my mom was my sister. He also didn’t card me when I ordered my vodka. #1 How dare you? (I have the face of a goddamn minor!) #2 I hope I look as young as my mom does when I’m in my fifties!

Happy birthday to my favorite hipster ♥

Happy 2nd birthday to my favorite chumbawamba!

Uncle Anthony says that you color like how Auntie Mayan drives (how dare he!), but keep coloring outside the lines, kid… Life’s more interesting that way ♥

Back to the scene of the crime! Birthday shots at Bub’s with the birthday girl last night. It felt good to be home ♥

Dinner and drinks at Whisknladle with my loves last night! 31 feels a lot like 30.

Happy birthday to the oldest 32-year-old I know! Love you, Pammie ♥

Chel’s birthday brunch at Prepkitchen last Sunday!

(Photo courtesy of @instapammie—I was too busy getting served by Anthony to take any pictures! Ha.)