$10 and 100 ring tosses later, I am still without a rastafarian banana monkey.

Oh hey, I’m just blogging from my new Macbook Pro with retina display. No bigs!

I bought it with two credit cards and the promise of my firstborn, but I don’t have to use my old macbook held together by binder clips anymore, so I’m just going to focus on that.

I never thought I’d be shopping on Black Friday or eating Hot Dog on a Stick at two in the morning (or at any time really), yet there I was at Parkway Plaza with my sister and my preggo bestie doing both of those things…

One of the few designer accessories I’ll splurge on is my glasses—partly because I wear them 24/7 (even in the shower if there’s a spider in the bathroom… yikes!), but mostly because the last time I got my eyes checked may or may not have been during the Clinton regime. Clearly, I need quality that lasts.

Nobody needs a Marc by Marc Jacobs laptop case. Or iPhone wristlet. Or tablet case. But I’ve been eyeballing them all day today, and I’ve decided that I can’t live without them!

Maybe if I had used protection sooner, a binder clip wouldn’t be holding my Macbook Pro together right now.

This would have been useful when I burned my thigh on my laptop. Or when my curling iron rolled off the bathroom counter and I tried to catch it with my vagina.

I really should start wearing pants around hot surfaces.