Errol: our boxing coach puts a 20 pound medicine ball on your lower back so you don’t put your butt up when you’re doing planks
Me: dude i totally put my butt up when it gets hard
Errol: that’s what she said!
|This one time I painted a living room with a girl.
This was a handful of years back. It was about eight months before the huge, flame-out of a breakup. That day, though? That day we painted the living room? It was pretty uneventful. We painted my parents living room for $50 between us and a pizza. That was it. I think we watched Anchorman or something after that.
But it still holds as one of the most indelible memories I have. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not still in love, it happened, it was good, it ended, and we’ve both moved on. But I’ll never forget that day. Because it’s never, in the long run, about the grand gestures. You can fly across the world and show up on her doorstep with a rose in your teeth and a ring in a little velvet box but I can guarantee you that – more often than not – she’s going to remember the time you built the birdhouse in the back yard, or what have you, a whole lot more.
Life wasn’t meant to be taken in large movements. The next day will inevitably arrive, you’ll sleep, and the moment will have passed. But when you have a hundred thousand small moments, you can step back and appreciate the picture a lot more than metaphorically blowing your load on some grand moment that, in all honesty, look, you’re not Bruce Fucking Springsteen, you’re not going to be able to blow everyone’s mind every single night. You’re not Romeo and/or Juliet. There’s no reason to drink the poison together in some flame-out gesture. So that leaves us with the small stuff. It’s all about the detail.
That’s what love is. Attention to detail.
And the moment will end. And then things will get boring. And it might get a little quiet. And it might all end horribly. And you might hate each other at the end. And you might walk away from each other one day and never speak again. But that’s just how it goes.
But she’ll remember the time you held the door open for her on your first date.
But everything ends. And I’ll tell you why you have to make the small things, the small moments count so much more:
One day, probably a while longer from now, when old age takes a hold of someone, she might just only remember your smile. Everything you ever did together, every second, every moment, every beat, every morning spent in bed, every evening spent together on the sofa, all of that – gone. Everything you ever did will be reduced to the head of a pin. She won’t remember your name. She’ll just remember your smile, and she’ll smile. She won’t know why. It’s a base, gut reaction. But she’ll smile, uncontrollably, and it will come from somewhere so deep as to know that you touched her on a primal, honest, and true level that no scientist, scholar, or savant could ever begin to explain. There is no more. There is nothing else. There is just this: She’ll remember your smile, and she’ll smile.
And you know what? That’s all that really matters in the end.
Goapele at Anthology last night with my faves ♥
Now who do I have to bone to get @joelmchale to follow me?
When I was 18, my friend Nick told me, “Linkin Park… Remember that name. They’re gonna be HUGE someday.” I downloaded a few of their demos off Napster (yes, I was 18 that long ago), and I’ve been a solid Linkin Park fan ever since.
They released their first album and had a small show at Canes a year after that, and anyone who knew me back then knows what a sobby mccryface I was when it sold out before I could get tickets. They haven’t played a small venue since, but I was able to see them on their Meteora tour in 2004 from the nosebleed section.
Tonight, though, I got to see Mike Shinoda’s handsome face from ten feet away in the pit. My favorite performance was of One Step Closer, the first Linkin Park song I ever heard. Definitely takes me back!
Arlene’s 7-year-old daughter, Gisella, made me a Valentine’s Day card at school because she knew I didn’t have a Valentine this year. Thanks for the reminder, kid! Haha. I love that little munchkin. I would pin her card up in my cube at work, but it’d be overshadowed by Belle’s gaggle of heart-shaped balloons!
I got my sexy new monitor at work today:
Jesse: all the girls were gushing when belle & jen got their flowers & balloons & shit
Me: oh for fuck’s sake… good thing i was off on monday
Jesse: it was pretty barftastic… not that we’re bitter or anything
Me: pfffft. who needs a man when i have 27″ right here in my face?
I expected it to be harder (that’s what she said).
Till next season, Angry Birds…
It’s Monday. It’s Valentine’s Day. Some deep tissue action at Zen Sanctuary was def necessary.
Adele – Someone Like You (Live Acoustic)
I heard that you’re settled down
That you found a girl and you’re married now
I heard that your dreams came true
Guess she gave you things I didn’t give to you
When I came into work on Friday, they told all the employees we were going to have a mandatory meeting at noon. Jesse and I went crazy trying to figure out what sparked this unexpected meeting—Were they laying people off? Did they find out that Jesse drank that unclaimed Red Bull in the fridge? Are my yoga pants too casual for Casual Friday???
Four hours later, I found out that my stomach fell out of my butt for nothing. They surprised us with a 30-minute break from work to play Taboo: Marketing vs. Customer Service!
Krystal: It’s something you might eat for breakfast
Me: Pancakes. French toast. Eggs. A biscuit!
Krystal: It’s fluffier.
Me: What’s fluffier than a biscuit???
We won (even though I couldn’t think of anything fluffier than a biscuit), so the customer service department has to make us coffee every day next week!
My annual review was amazeballs, my boss ordered me a 27″ cinema display to show her appreciation, and our marketing team smoked customer service in Taboo. Work was def good to me this week.
I don’t want to see my colon tonight, guys.
Quote of the night.
Just when I thought I had nothing to live for… Prepare for total destruction, bitches.
This was me planning my exit strategy out of bed this morning.
I skipped our workout tonight for Mary’s birthday dinner, so Arlene told me to “prepare for a beat down” tomorrow. Yikes. Does carbo-loading with Hot Hot Mexican rolls from Sushi Deli 2 count as preparation?
Antho freestyling to Bel Biv Devoe’s Poison on Dance Central = highlight of my weekend.
Only two things still warm this heart—margaritas and cute animals.
Prince Erik: People in love don’t try to kill each other.
Nikita: Are you serious?
When I’m not getting my ass handed to me by Arlene, I like to go to the gym and take turbo kickboxing classes. Or walk barefoot on shards of glass—pretty much any activity that’s less painful than working out with that crazy Mexican. I was early for kickboxing tonight, so instead of warming up on the treadmill, I played Angry Birds on my phone in the ladies locker room. This girl came in and asked me what time it was and if I was going to kickboxing. We started chatting, walked to the class together, and ended up working out next to each other. I don’t normally stay for abs at the end of class, but I didn’t want to look like a little bitch in front of my new buddy, Coleen, so I pushed through it. Afterward, she offered me her number so that we could go to classes together, and I found myself agreeing to work out with her Saturday morning. So not only do I get tortured by Arlene five times a week, I now have a gym buddy to push me at what’s supposed to be my safe haven away from Arlene! Why do Mexican girls always want to be my friend??? LOL. Ay guey.
Is this where I’m going to die?