There was no doubt that I woke up in a dude’s apartment this morning. Thirty or so empty craft brew bottles lined the mantle behind me. There was an outdoor patio set in the dining room, complete with a hole in the table for the absent umbrella. And to top it all off, my friend’s roommate offered me packets of ketchup to eat for breakfast. Ha! At least he made me coffee first.
Jesse and I agreed that if it wasn’t for my vagina, we’d have a serious bromance going on.
Everything that happens from now on
This is pouring rain
This is paralyzed
You were having a shitty day at work today, so I shared my favorite Bon Iver song with you to make you feel better. And then I found out what you did. Now every time I hear this song, I’ll be reminded of the exact moment you lost me as a friend.
Yesterday, I brought my lunch and gym clothes to work.
My untouched ground turkey is still sitting in the fridge because Mary and I had 25¢ wings at JT’s instead, and my unused gym clothes are still neatly folded in the trunk of my car because Christian wanted to go to happy hour.
My work’s proximity to the bar is clearly foiling my plans to eat better and work out.
So avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys—to woo women—and, in that endeavour, laziness will not do.
We took family photos at Coronado Beach this weekend for my grandma’s 80th birthday. I’ll spare you the images of me and my 40+ Asian relatives in our clichéd blue jeans and white tops, and instead leave you with this gorgeous sunset.
Padres game and entirely too much beer and sangria swirl margaritas for a Thursday night with Christine, Jessie and Christian. We scored free tickets to the game, but I def paid for it the next day at work! Holy hangover.
I had Sunday brunch, bloody marys and breakthroughs at The Tractor Room with Jessie, Christine and Pammie, or shall I say “Can’t Commit” Mary, Mama Rosa Mary and The TJ Mary—I’ll let you guess who’s who ;) I’m The Drunk Clam Mary, obvi.
me: i need a serious eyebrow waxing pammie: you tell me you need something serious every time i see you
a serious eyebrow waxing
a serious hair cut
a serious cheeseburger
(looks at my eyebrows)
ooh. you DO need a serious eyebrow waxing. me: seriously, right?
Still recovering from the craziness and amazingness that was Friday night, Christian and I took it easy on Saturday with some hookah, a two-drink limit, and Lucha Libre surf ‘n’ turf.
Gaslamp one weekend, PB the next… Seriously, who am I right now? I’m pretty sure my next stop will be an intervention with my family and friends—I’m not talking about the pool party at the Hard Rock Hotel, either (although at this point, it’s a valid assumption).
I went to work yesterday morning, had happy hour (and a $200 tab according to my bank account!) at JT’s with my coworkers afterward, never made it home or to The Casbah as planned with Jessie last night, and woke up this morning in my coworker’s apartment.
Contrary to the last time I went out with all my work friends (AKA my manager’s drunken birthday disaster of 2008), I’m pretty sure we’ll all still be speaking to each other on Monday! Ha.